The Rise of Skywalker - Why it Sucks

Dipublikasikan tanggal 12 Jun 2022
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Komentar

  • I love how rey mentions that she can sense that the dagger has done bad things while holding the youngling slayer 9000

    • Not to mention lightsabers are built WITH the force as seen in clone wars S6 E5 or 6. However Cal Kestis had the rare ability to sense the past in certain objects, very convient for Rey to also have this.

    • @Jekt so are the younglings.

    • Lmao

    • Ooooooooffff.....

    • Lmfao 😂

  • imagine being a soldier and in a meetup, you hear "Somehow, Hitler is back"

    • @OnlyEchos it's been adapted in 2015. "Er ist wieder da"

    • Better yet, imagine a Hitler adopting the name of one of the Holocaust Jews to "honor" their legacy.

    • @Dida Diego idk about a movie but there is a the book by a german author titled "Look who's back". Maybe be it has been adapted.

    • @Unterdessen 8 Very nice.

  • I feel so bad for Boyega, Finn had great raw potential as a character for so many reasons, hell, the actor even loved SW but the writes completely stuffed him

    • @Micah W they did that for social media points, for upfront woke points. Very cheap move to go after the black demographic to buy tickets think they would have a new black hero. But the thing is, the actor is not really attractive. He has a big jaw and even for a young guy doesn't have the sexual charisma that others do

    • I was so excited for him to be a Jedi. BUT NOOOOOOOOO

    • Boyatega Bumbum is an actor in SW

    • @Hughvon Ramdass I always thought it was pretty telling how in TFA....JJ SHOWS us that Finn is a Frontline assault trooper......and Ruin Johnson simply TELLS us he used to be a janitor. The writing speaks for itself.

    • @Xirpzy They should have had Rey be a more sarcastic and roguish version with more street smarts which is why she would connect with Han Solo, also being an orphan and living on a scavebger planet that makes perfect sense. Poe could easily take Leia's role as the sassy confrontational military leader he already was.

  • It’s so sad to see the arc of Darth Vader, dying to save his son from Palpatine and therefore culminating the prophecy and bringing balance to the force, all thrown away because somehow the emperor is back and now Rey is the chosen Jedi the prophecy spoke about? That throws away the most beautiful arc in cinema to the trash, and it hurts me so much.

    • @LT War Chief so then what’s the most beautiful arc in cinema?

    • I mean I agree it undermines the story told in the first 6 movies, but "the most beautiful arc in cinema"? Are you high, or do you just not watch a lot of movies?

    • This is why the rise of Skywalker is the worst Star Wars movie from a narrative perspective because it ruins every Star Wars movie that’s come before it for THAT VERY REASON.

    • They took the chosen one schtick from anakin

    • @Manolo 03 hey look I'm sorry about my comment earlier I was in a shit mood. It was a great arc and if you loved it I'm glad you did.

  • "Somehow Palpatine returned" is a line that for the life of me i cannot understand how it made it past the first draft

    • @nathW00 fr, thats one aspect of harry potter that was absolutely correct. a collective people that had gone through a horrific massacre in their history would 100% be in hard denial and fear if they were told that their greatest enemy suddenly returned out of nowhere. there should have been waaaay more internal conflict between the jedi & their supporters before the final showdown

    • Harry Potter had the exact same story. A SUPER evil threat from years ago has now returned. The difference is that in Harry Potter,’most people need a little more convincing that just “somehow Voldemort returned.” It takes people literally a full movie of calling Harry a liar and a coward until people see Voldemort and finally believe that he’s back

    • yes, that's a very [INSERT DIALOGUE HERE]

    • The actor even cringed before the line 😆

    • Somehow this line made it in the film

  • I feel that getting infinite money to make a trilogy of Star Wars movies and then not planning anything long term is the most incredible thing anyone has ever done. The sheer amount of bravery, the complete blindness, I can’t help but be amazed

    • @Epic Music okay, I have to ask. How is 5 years a weird age gap?

    • Nobody can even agree as to why either. Was is for just plain greed? To push an agenda or have some subliminal propaganda? Making something just to spite George Lucas for the prequels? Disney just.... hating Star Wars? Maybe even a combination of those things but what stands is that the movies became completely and utterly unnecessary and the very best part of them was *the very first teaser trailer.*

    • @Jim I can agree Ruin Johnson was quite original in his vision. But his vision still very badly missed the mark. It was terrible. Even more terrible than using the same set up as ANH

    • @GrapeCheckerBoard The first movie was never assured to have a sequel. The whole project was a huge gamble that only Lucas had any faith in. Everyone he showed it to said the script was shit, the actors roasted his dialogue near-constantly, the mythology was complete nonsense… It was an absolute miracle that it turned out so beloved in spite of its flaws. We think of Star Wars as trilogies now, but that was never an idea anyone had from the start.

  • I always thought that the reveal of rey being a palpatine would have been monumentally less stupid if it had be revealed that SHE killed her parents. The flash back where she's reaching out and calling out to them - imagine that that memory was always cut short and blocked out, and only now after killing chewie (committing to that death) does the rest of that memory come back. The memory of her reaching out and as a child, shooting force lightning out of her hands and accidentally killing her parents. That could have been very interesting. I still think her being a palpatine is the dumbest thing ever. That just would have made it infinitely less dumb.

    • ... or add in a few more details, like how Rey's grandma was That Waitress who was, long ago, squooshed in a Waitress Sandwich between a younger Senator Palapatine and that other senator (whose name sounds a lot like Kennedy).

    • I like it, but you're thinking in the deep end of the pool while this movie was clearly only interested in going ankle deep.

    • @Joshua Pacheco I don't disagree with that either haha. My silly fan fiction was purposely stunted by the confines of certain plot points we were given. Like if she haaaaaad to be a palpatine, that would make it less stupid. But I agree she should have remained a nobody.

    • @Joshua Pacheco no, Plagueis died during episode 1. The logic of the prequels wouldve been shattered if hed actually survived

    • @Don't mind me it wouldn't be the first time (or the last) that the properties of the Force lost all internal consistency, but at least we'd get a more interesting character out of it.

  • I always found it weird that Kylo ditches his cross guard saber in this movie. That Lightsaber is like the most important object in the entire trilogy. It was the first 'new' thing shown back in the original force awakens trailer and both Rey and Kylo were seen using it. Considering in the current canon you get a white lightsaber (typically associated with force users who are not jedi or sith) by purifying a red lightsaber, I thought for sure that if Kylo was going to have a redemption arc he would purify his saber to show that he does want to be redeemed. Then if you go down the route of killing off Kylo while doing the whole Reylo thing, you could have Rey bury the Luke and Leia's sabers but then keep Kylo's saber as a sort of symbol of her having a part of him with her and in turn using a weapon of evil for a new purpose, to bring a new light. Instead Kylo just uncermonisly chucks it into the ocean and gets a random blue saber to show that he's a jedi now....like why?

    • @Integra But Kylo didn’t use his mother’s saber tho, he used Anakin’s in the final battle. It wuz Rey who used Leia’s saber…

    • @Integra It's not really something that needs, or even should be explained. If you don't just get that then you have no business watching movies.

    • @Duck Defender that’s wrong lol 😂 every single Jedi’s lightsaber are supposed to have some meaning to the owner. That’s why they all are different. Edit: even the sith make theirs unique, sidious’ we’re super fancy

    • It doesnt represent anything or do anything other than look "cool".

    • Because it's red and therefore evil. Same reason the good guys never use Star Destroyers, not even Venators. Because inanimate objects are evil and these movies are written for 5 year olds.

  • Well done. To add to the goofiness of the Chewbacca “death” scene, right after the explosion, Kylo and Rey are both just there with their crews and everyone just… goes their separate ways? I saw the movie once and I’ll never forget that.

    • @David yeah my bad ill just go get educated for you mate. Hope it makes your life so much better for you mr overlord of ID-tv

    • @Hayden Nash (1) “Death” was in quotes. What do you think that means? (2) Did you not watch the video? He literally went over that scene. (3) Have you heard of Google? It’s pretty useful.

    • @xXx_ROtFD_XIII_XII :3 Yeah I guess "lots of power" was what I meant by "all powerful". I get that he's a weirdo and I enjoyed that in prior two movies but him just standing there after the Chewbacca explosion was dumb. So was Lando Calrissian appearing just for a holiday special. And that kiss/death at the end of the movie was anything but "poetic".

    • @xXx_ROtFD_XIII_XII :3 There were also stormtroopers with another ship. The all powerful Kylo Rey, with near-equal powers and command over a huge military force hust stood there wistfully.

    • Wait chewy dies? Wtf haha

  • The bit about Rey almost having a saber staff made my heart sink into my stomach. I want to cry. It is bewildering how many incomprehensibly bad decisions went into the making of this film. Not even the worst parts of the PT made me feel this way.

    • @calypsis it wasn't specifically just that, but the color and what the gem its made from adds/changes about the blade lent themselves to specific things, which generally fell under certain "classes/jobs" the blue ones had more power and "weight" to them, making it more ideal for the guardians who were the martial arm of the Jedi for example. Granted, iirc this is all no longer canon, but that was what it used to mean. Unless I'm completely miss remembering XD

    • I might just be weird, but I really hate the "lighstaber color = job class" thing. I like the idea of a crystal reflecting its user's personality, but leaving the meaning fluid and up for interpretation in the same way people are, rather than just being Hogwart's Houses.

    • What hurt me is that the saber-staff and orange blade is reserved for TEMPLE GUARDS, otherwise known as sith hunters

  • I'd rather a mediocre movie that at least logically followed the story from TLJ than whatever this was. Even if it was a bad movie at least it would feel like a more cohesive trilogy that actually amounted to something. This movie is so bad it retroactively makes the entire trilogy feel pointless.

    • @Jim Jam if Rian helmed the whole thing, Like, leis and Han would be worse off then what we had.

    • @Turnip TLJ certainly did stop some of the plot threads JJ Abrams had set up, but it did not retcon anything from that movie. If you watch TFA and TLJ back to back, it doesn't feel like TLJ is undoing anything that was included in TFA. It definitely answers things in presented in TFA, but doesn't destroy it. It took things in a direction people didn't expect/want, but it didn't retcon anything. On the other hand, TRoS was actively destroying anything that was included in TLJ, plot wise and thematically. It tried to retcon any of the revelations in TLJ and go with its own thing instead. It didn't take the plot in a different direction, it erased the plot of the last two movies.

    • @Valerie Finnigan I dgaf about what you think about me. Why don’t you focus on the topic at hand and stop trying to defend trash writing. Damn I bet you love the sequels too with the logic your spewing

    • @Valerie Finnigan huh? Did you not say Vader never beat obiwan? My bad. You right. Vader lost all 3 encounters (which includes their last encounter in ANH) forgot about that part. Obiwan didn’t die. He simply let it alder kill him which doesn’t count as defeat. My bad

    • @Lord Grim You knew who I was talking about, yet saw fit to insult me anyway. That you got so defensive when I called you proves I was right about you. I could pardon you if you honestly misunderstood. But you rejoiced far too much in catching an error. I knew your intent and only gave as good as I got.

  • Hearing "But no, he literally made him...in a cave," my brain immediately went, "With a box of scraps!" and you did not disappoint. Bravo sir.

    • TONY STARK BUILT THIS IN A CAVE…. WITH A BOX OF SCRAPS!! Obadiah Stane is a badass.

    • That part got me too

  • I have to totally agree about the Rey/Finn/Poe trio. They totally neglected any development for Finn and Poe after the first movie which made how they acted in this movie make little sense. It was totally only the charisma of the actors which made us give any of this a chance. I mean, you had Oscar Isaac and you do this to him? I would hate SW too!

    • @bocoy noiu seeing the comment you ripped this from directly under this is pretty funny

    • amount of bravery, the complete blindness, I can’t help but be amazed

  • Every time Marcus posts Star Wars reviews, it's basically been a guarantee that I'll be nodding along non-stop for the duration. This one is no exception! But holy cow man. That Kylo rewrite was truly above and beyond! It was such a beautifully presented concept. You laid it out perfectly, and crafted a central arc and storyline for this trilogy that lives up to the legacy of the Star Wars and Skywalker names! Your description of it alone had a deeper emotional impact than anything in the actual movie. Kudos! I genuinely think this may be your best video yet.

    • fr, that lightsaber change idea was also simple brilliance to the movie that would have felt better

    • @Taxi Rob Go see a franchise from hell. Search " share his vision " in youtube. Be careful on his page hes considered a demon.

    • @eioshen boboi it makes the entire franchise pointless, just like Star Trek: Beyond.

    • that actually amounted to something. This movie is so bad it retroactively makes the entire trilogy feel pointless.

  • That line “somehow Palpatine returned” is one of the worst lines in movie history, not just SW history

  • This film somehow managed to piss off both people who loved The Last Jedi and people who hated it. That might be the only accomplishment this movie has going for it

    • @Manz not a former fan of the sequels, the things I like I still like about it. They just didn’t do it correctly at the end it’s not like I hate everything because they didn’t bring it home at the end that’s a foolish argument.

    • @Sergio Mendoza just goes to show how shit it is. I will die on the hill defending the prequels existence. They added so much to the star wars universe. Yes I enjoy the originals as well. Former Sequel fans like you and cosmonaut just accepted defeat lol

    • @Manz I’m not gonna argue with you about the last Jedi I like it. Just take what information and live with it lol I really don’t like talking about that movie or really these movies as a whole anymore. Just exhausting, and pointless because at the end of the day they fucked it up and it’ll never be the same again.

    • @Sergio Mendoza the last jedi started the fracture of the franchise. Terrible film.

    • People who liked last jedi deserves 3 more awefull star wars movies

  • My biggest gripe with the entire sequel trilogy is that I knew exactly how it was going to end halfway through the first movie. Say what you will about the last Jedi, but at least that tried to go in a new direction. Redeeming Kylo actually ruins Luke even further cause it means he was wrong. If Luke was contemplating killing his own flesh and blood I'd figure it would be for a damn good reason, especially seeing as how he saw good in Vader and brought him back from the dark side. I'm pretty sure Rian Johnson had planned to make Kylo irredeemable and worse than Vader, but Disney failed to pull the trigger. The Star Wars sequel trilogy has to be one of the biggest blunders in cinematic history

    • @Donavan Frea that's fair I'm inclined to agree. Well said

    • @lethargic troll I didn't have a problem with Luke trying to off his nephew initially. It was when we finished the trilogy that I had a problem. Redeeming Kylo was not only predictable from frame one, but it makes Luke look straight up foolish. I don't mind characters making mistakes if there's a good reason for them. That's one of the reasons I couldn't get behind Rey she was too infallible. What they had Luke do in the sequel trilogy is out of character and they didn't have a good reason for doing so

    • Luke can't make mistakes? I didn't like Luke trying to off his nephew either but it didn't ruin his character for me.

  • I actually like the idea of Ben living and atoning for his sins. He can finally rewrite the errors of the Jedi and Sith and just teach about the force as a whole. The Skywalker name can live on and still continue it's grand legacy.

    • That’s not how the force works

  • One of my least favorite lines is when Poe says something along the lines of “we only have 16 hours to stop them” absolutely unnecessary and I couldn’t stop thinking about it for the rest of the movie

    • i did not like poe in rise of skywalker

    • It's easy tension, but it's also false tension. It's also a ridiculous ticking clock to something that *Palpatine should already have done* Why give the galaxy an ultimatum if your fleet is not ready? Why wouldn't he give them time to surrender _after_ his planet destroying ships are already out there and pointing their guns?

    • @Laughing Bob That's exactly my point: I don't want to think about those logistics, and you're not supposed to, but the movie bringing it up kind of forces the viewer to do it.

    • @Tuomas Vanne i advise you dont think about kt too much. Star wars works in a way like it does of our idea of space with no research. The more you think about time in space the less the whole thing makes sense

    • And what the hell does 16 hours even mean in a space opera? That just raises so many questions unnecessarily, like how long are hours on each planet, how does lightspeed travel factor in, how is time measured when in outer space etc.

  • It's still mind boggling to me that Disney made one of the best characters of all time, Klaud, and didn't have him grow 9 arms and light-saber duel Palpatine who was secretly Darth Jar-Jar. Everyone was expecting it to happen after all the previous Star Wars movies, but Disney yet again refused to develop their new characters. Hopefully Lucas will return for a Klaud spinoff Disney+ series, because Star Wars really needs some stars and wars.

  • It is insane to me that Disney bought Lucasfilm for literally billions of dollars and didn’t think they needed a plan for a new Star Wars trilogy and I like your changes a lot, especially the change with Rey dying and Kylo having to atone for everything he did

    • To be fair: Considering what kind of things with very different qualities George Lucas threw out for people to buy (the prequels, a ton of video games, toys, comics, books, etc.), to think you can just do "something" and people will eat it up is not that far off. Rogue one was very much liked by the fans - and it is basically a movie showing a ton of stuff.

    • @Rose Olivas To be fair, Morbius didn’t do well at the box office….twice even. Though it’s notorious, the company didn’t really make much out of it financially in the end. Maybe there is still hope….just maybe, though.

    • @LupineShadowOmega unfortunalty..

    • @Geekreg Yeah, but that's the point. If they needed to do so, then that was more money to be spent on top of what they'd already paid. Rule number one of corporations...they are never paying unless there is no other way.

    • Lucas had a plan for the 3 prequels. And and they still sucked. Harder actually.

  • I've always felt like ''The Last Jedi'' isn't Rey. Luke's whole arc in TLJ is about dealing with the fact that the Jedi books and philosophies are not good, lead to Darth Vador and Kylo Ren, and that a new status quo needs to be created, making him the actual last Jedi, in the traditional sense of the word.

    • I think Rian or someone confirmed that The Last Jedi refers to Luke. I agree with you as well

  • In the throne room scene, what I wanted was for Kylo Ren to turn good and Rey to switch to the dark side. Imagine that premise. If done correctly, this could have been soooo awesome

    • That would've been sick! I didn't hate the idea of Rey being related to Palpatine but if only it was mentioned in the beginning of the last movie or the end of the second movie, and its something she struggles with versus mentioning it in the last 20 minutes of the last movie 💀💀💀

  • When Palpatine said “It’s Sheevin time.” and shot out a bunch of lightning, this easily became one of the movies ever made.

  • I honestly thought Phasma died in the first film after they dumped her down a chute and thought, "Huh, that was an anticlimactic way to treat a seemingly important character". And then she returned in the second film, and I ended up with the exact same conclusion anyway.

    • @ExeErdna the saga just ends at ROTJ with luka partying with the ewoks. The extended universe is just as bad as Disney's. Luke ripping black holes through the force? Yeah pass.

    • @Zephyr 7-9 were a complete waste of damn time. The true sequel is the Darth Caedus saga in the comics. Which 7-9 rips off, because they didn't want to pay the creator of that storyline.

    • @ExeErdna Hyped her as a badass then made her a massive coward directly responsible for the destruction of Starkiller Base then threw her away. Then threw her away again. Rian wasted tons of character and plot in his selfish ego, but people like to forget that JJ did no better.

    • They hyped her as some badass only to be thrown away.

  • Above all mistakes, Finn not having a proper character arc throughout the trilogy really disappointed me. He had so much potential but Disney decided to focus solely on Rey and her story.

    • Just like the OG trilogy, Finn got the exact same treatment as Han Solo! That's all, don't be reading too much into it.

    • @Verminator4 well that makes no sense still due to the storyline he had in TFA. He was set up through and through to not only be force sensitive, but practically a Jedi in training. He had proficiency in wielding a blade due to his background and even gave Kylo a fight for his money. All that was point to one thing and then TLJ said “fk that. He’s gonna be what we make him” then made him replay his entire arc again and just become a side character smh

    • @Lord Grim Maybe we could have had both. There've been a bunch of characters both in the movies and expanded universe material who became jedi after having their first crowning moment at the controls of a starfighter, most notably Luke Skywalker. The main reason I think the starfighter pilot route would have made sense for Finn, at least initially, was because Poe was the character he had by far the most chemistry with in the first movie, and they had that scene where they flew that Tie Fighter together to escape the star destroyer near the beginning of the film. That said I think doing more or less anything with Finn other than what Disney did would have been better

    • She has no story or character. She is a nothing. They focused on nothing.

    • @Verminator4 or and just hear me put here. Or just have him be a damn JEDI like he was originally set up to be🤦🏾‍♂️

  • 56:45 Not to mention one of the people who owned one of those lightsabers was Anakin who whether you dislike the prequels or not you have to admit having his lightsaber buried on the planet he grew up on as a slave and the same planet his mother had died on is kind of disrespectful in a storytelling way.

    • just imagining ghost anakin screaming at the universe for that is beautoful

    • this movie is so fucked up that I enjoy reading comments about the gripes people have with this movie and I always find new things that don't make any sense or are just not really thought out of. That is because there are so many problems that one can't catch up on all of them. Btw Luke's uncle and aunt were murdered on that planet and that is also the whole point of why he decides to leave with Obi Wan. These movies were made by the casuals for the casuals...

  • I love the idea of Rey dying and leaving a villain Kylo to redeem himself, that feels like a nice echo of Anakin's death that puts Ben on the right path Also for Rose, I would suggest in TLJ, she should be spiteful or distrusting of Poe (and Poe goes with them), since yknow he did get her sister killed. I think it'd be a nice arc for her to forgive him and maybe grow to like him by the end of RoS. And it would give a character with solid reason to push back on his cocky leadership style instead of Holdo

  • Remember back in the good ol days, when everyone was disappointed with the prequel trilogy, and the debate was whether the Star Wars universe might not have been better off if George Lucas just hadn't made the prequels? Remember how even the people who liked the prequels didn't dispute the fact that they could have been, and should have been better; and that despite being generally enjoyable, the prequels were a missed opportunity to develop beloved characters and bring to life on screen a body of lore that had been (mostly) intelligently expanded in the medium of books for 30 years? Man, those were the days. When the worst Star Wars got was new material failing to be as good as three of the best and most successful films ever released.

    • @Nyarlath Begins no one looks back fondly on the last jedi. There's nothing remotely good about it. Fucking Rose Tico.

    • @ShockwaveFPS Studios Yeah, I think so too.

    • @BIG MAK Nah, The Last Jedi, while not a perfect film or even the best Star Wars movie, and also while being flawed, it has a lot of interesting things to look at. I'm absolutely sure it will be looked back fondly in two or three decades, perhaps even less. The Rise Of Skywalker however...

    • @Nyarlath Begins The vast majority of people still think the Phantom Manace is a pretty bad movie in most ways. I think that The Last Jedi and The Rise of Skywalker will be remembered equally bad 20 years later. There is just... nothing to defend or latch on to in those two movies. In fact, its easier to look fondly on the Phantom Manace because its connected to the whole saga while episodes 8 and 9 are bad movies that push the original vision off a cliff.

    • @Nyarlath Begins Who knows… I predict the Sequel Trilogy’ll probably get a lot of defense over the next trilogy. It seems like a tradition at this point.

  • I think the most insane thing in this whole video is that even after all this time and how bad this movie really is and how much you dislike or would change, you still rate it as high as 5/10...

    • @Virtue Yeah they refuse to accept that george lucas was only a part of why star wars was great instead of the sole source of its greatness. It's like saying that the Beatles discography isn't as good as that one song John Lennon wrote about women and their social status in the world.

    • @Patrick Naughton this is why nobody likes prequel fans

    • @Virtue It was 6 or 7 full paragraphs of your average "the prequels are smarter than you" crap

    • @Patrick Naughtonwhat was the dude saying?

    • ​@keepitfreshkid93 Didn't read. Currently laughing. Angry prequel apologists continue to be more entertaining than anything added to Star Wars post 1997.

  • The random kiss between the two women at the end of the movie is just so funny to me because of how it represents Disney pandering instead of actually including a gay main character. Easier to edit out a two second scene than to lose profits in China.

    • Live slug reaction

    • ITS THE DRUNK PERCY MAN

    • Ok I thought I was the only one who saw that 😂

    • @N0TYALC I would have preferred Finn and Poe relationship instead of inventing 2 completely forgettable love interests that just bloat the film even further. Or just have them not have love interests at all and just 2 good friends? It's all cringe anyway. The point is Disney are hypocrites.

  • Agree on all points, with one addition: Lando's function in the story should have been occupied by Rose. Reduces coincidences (because her assistance comes from within their faction, instead of outside it), reduces obscene attempts at eliciting nostalgia, and draws from her theme of uniting the galaxy against tyranny.

  • Fin was the greatest loss of potential in the whole disney series. A chance to explore life as the enemy. But nah. And he wasn’t even a soldier. He was a janitor. He never even killed anyone.

  • I feel like the best direction would've been a focus on finn, a stormtrooper who although manipulated from childhood, is saved by the force and eventually the force leads him to destroy the oppressive first order

  • I haven't seen star wars, never been a fan of it but I watched this video without any context but still understood everything by the end of it. Truly shows that Marcus' explaining skills are damn good.

  • The idea of a theater of kids crying and adults being pissed because of Chewie while Cosmonaut is just uncontrollably laughing is beautiful.

    • @Cole Collins I had to hold back my eruption of laughter when leia flew in space in the last jedi

    • @Cole Collins I wasn’t even on drugs and I was ctfu so bad when she yelled “Chewie!?!?” 😭😭😭

    • Like that one Charles Addams drawing.

    • @AntiSeth I'd kept a pretty OK lid on my audible eyerolling as well, but the kiss was where I just let out a guffaw and Seinfeld-ed myself.

    • @Cole Collins I felt the same way, but it wasn’t the Chewie thing that did me in. I was chuckling to myself the whole movie because of how ridiculous it was, but what made me and my brother lose it in the theater was the Reylo kiss. I wasn’t even on drugs either. Just laughed my ass off.

  • God I would've loved if Kylo Ren was that rebelious teen that wanted to change society so he went and joined a shady group of mercs (Knights of Ren) rose quickly through the ranks with his slight Jedi training and now commands this brutal group of mercenaries that infiltrates the power stratum in the Empire so he can acheive his goal of ending war. The only problem is that he believes that the ends justify the means and ruthlessly kills any who oppose his rather childish vision of peace int he galaxy. He didn't deserve redemption at all and he still would've been a good character.

  • To add details to your force awakens rewrite, with Poe being with Finn after the crash, I think what they could have done is instead of two being weirdly separated after crashing in the same ship, they track through the desert together for a bit when they find Rey, with Poe saying he’s from the resistance and introducing the stakes to Rey. Then, when the first order attacks, Poe gets separated, maybe they even think he’s dead, it doesn’t really matter. This also improves Finn’s character slightly I think, as instead of blatantly lying about being in the resistance, Rey just assumes he is after Poe says it and Finn goes along with it.

  • This movie genuinely makes me depressed. I was pretty young when episode VII came out and, at the time, I was just excited to see another movie in a historic franchise come out. I didn't care about how good it was, I just wanted to see beloved characters return to the big screen. And when it came out, my little mind was blown away. When episodes VIII and IX came out I was a little more mature and started to pick up on what a good and bad movie was. And when I watched them, I knew that something terrible had happened. Disney had destroyed a franchise that I had loved. And because of their little planning and awful story telling, we will NEVER see the original trilogy cast get a proper ending with their characters. And with that, now we know what all of the good star wars content (The Mandalorian, Ahsoka, Etc.) is leading up to. A disjointed awful mess of a trilogy that ruins characters and a beloved galaxy.

  • I can even imagine the resistance having their own clone army (although they’re not clones but you get the points)

  • "She is going to make the world know that every rose has it's thorns" is easily one of the best jokes you have made in all of your videos.

    • Rouge Rose is the best part of this video hands down 😂

    • *Is She With You?, by Hans Zimmer ft. Junkie XL, plays dramatically at the background*

    • Yikes, better not watch it then

    • its*

  • You gave me, not one, but two full chuckles. So much in fact that my kid asked me if I ate Santa Claus, and that was why we didn't get gifts last Christmas. So thanks for that.

  • The first time I watched the The Force Awakens I remember liking Kylo Rems character and just knowing that by the end of the trilogy he was going to die. I thought there was no other way he could’ve gotten out of this series other than dying, either as the bad guy or in a sacrifice. For what he did in the first movie alone, I couldn’t think of anyway he could get an ending different that dying. But I actually like your version and I think it even could have worked in the version we did get.

  • i think we can all agree that all of the actors deserve high praise for working with the scripts they got.

  • I find it especially hilarious that they made a point in The Force Awakens to have Han, a non Force user, tell Finn that they can’t just use the Force to figure shit out as they go. But in this movie that’s exactly how the Force works. It is so, so stupid.

  • The only experience that I can always remember about experiencing this movie is the final scene. Rey sees that random woman who asks “Rey, who?” She replies, “I’m Rey Skywalker” And then someone from across the room in the theater just goes “Oh- FUCK YOU!” And nearly everyone in the theater busts a gut laughing so hard that you can’t hear anything from the movie anymore.

    • @Finlay Ames that's an insult to fanfiction even

    • I pretty much had the same reaction here as I had with watching The Fate of the Furious ending when Dom decided to name the baby Brian.

    • I spent half the movie laughing cause it was feeling like a shit fan fiction. Character dies at end of chapter to leave cliff hanger? Instantly brought back. Can’t think of a good reason to find the muguffun? Stumble (or in this case fall through sand) onto it. Bring back characters for no reason (palatine and to a much lesser degree Lando). Make character try to admit their feelings but never do it (I though Finn would say he loved Rey, not being force sensitive. And most of all, randomly redeeming your bad guy with no build up (he literally spends the first 2 movies falling to randomly 180 in this movie), fall in love with the girl and then sacrifice himself. It was one of the funniest films I’ve seen in years, but not for the rights reasons.

    • I've seen videos of this. Still glad I didn't go.

    • 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

  • - Palpatine was't killed -The Empire wasn't destroyed -Luke didn't bring back the jedi order -Han Solo left Leia and return to be a criminal - The New Republic was a failure that a group of neonazis ended in a week -Anakin didn't bring balance to the force. -The Knights of Ren were cupboard figures. The sequel triology made pointless the original triology, the characters and universe didn't chance from episode IV to IX.

  • The best changes that could be made to the sequel trilogy would be to retcon them out of existence then burn the negatives and back up files.

  • I feel like Star Wars struggles with storytelling and to this point I still don’t see what they were trying to do with the sequels. And what’s more, I didn’t understand why Rey took the skywalker name and Kylo died. He was the actual connection to the sky walkers and it really would’ve made more sense to have him live… rather than just have him swap life forces a few times and then actually die.

  • It's funny how Mauler get's so much crap for having long videos, when even Cosmonaut who usually spends about 15 minutes on a movie has to spend an hour going through everything wrong with this.

  • I was in high school when Star Wars debuted in 1977. And all of the stuff from Disney/Lucasfilm (Rogue One partially excepted) has been dreadful. And destructive to what came before. It really is appalling.

  • Finn had by far the most interesting story line-a stormtrooper being changed by his conscience and the fallout that would ensue. Just a colossal drop of the ball to waste such interesting story capabilities with that.

  • Dude bravo! I had a great time laughing and agreeing with your strong points. BUT, I’m commenting because holy shit the ending swap with Ben on Tattooine is genius. That legit could have saved the entire film, if not trilogy. Nicely done!

  • The Kylo Ren redemption you imagine would have been so satisfying and would have save Luke, Leia and Anakin's own arcs and redemptions. He would create a different kind of jedi, acknowledging that feelings can also be a connection with the Force from a light side perspective (hint, hint: Obi-wan's last battle with Darth on the series) finally puting into canon the grey jedi: the past will die as he said on TLJ but he will atone nonetheless. And as for Finn he will also kill the past: leading a revolt of storm troopers to free them ending the First Order... but at the same time to end the Republic and the Resistance. All of that will die destroying that behemoth of state that Star Wars is so obsessed to be put over the galaxy. All systems will regain autonomy or group of them making more difficult for a jedi order or a sith duo to "winner takes all" competition.

  • Ben living instead of Rey at the end of episode 9 would have changed the whole trilogy for me. That is a truly epic idea that I’m sad we didn’t get to see.

    • While I would have like to see Ben live, why would the republic let him go? He would have been imprisoned/executed for war crimes surely?

    • Yes!! It would’ve been so good!

    • @V HYPLEX! The world would be better without you

    • In retrospect, I could go either way on that. Whether Ben was redeemed or not and whether he lived or died, what's important is: *this should have been HIS movie.* Having Palpatine put in a cameo appearance (in a flashback, which was what I figured was going to happen when one of the teaser trailers featured a recording of him laughing at the end) would have been fine, but what I wanted to see was what the First Order's new Supreme Leader Kylo Ren actually had planned for the galaxy once he'd conquered it. TFA had him trying (and failing) to be Darth Vader, TLJ had him giving up on trying to be Darth Vader and thereby succeeding where he'd failed (i.e. killing his master and seizing the throne from him), and TROS should therefore have been about whether Darth Vader's plans for ruling the galaxy (now that his grandson had effectively implemented them) had any merits to them. It could still have ended with the good guys winning and overthrowing his tyrannical rule (because yeah, tyrants with good intentions are still tyrants). In my version of the story, the end would have Rey sitting on his throne mourning the late Ben Solo's death while stroking her swollen midsection (very visibly pregnant with his child) and telling Poe Dameron that for all the horrible things he did as Kylo Ren, he wasn't entirely wrong, and the galaxy really *does* need a new form of government. While how they actually plan to achieve this would have to be left a bit vague (i.e. she calls everyone together to draft a new Constitution, but we're not shown what actually happens at that convention), it would at least tie up all the political threads every movie in this franchise (including the actual TROS) left hanging.

  • When I go to watch a movie, I’m trying to escape into the world of the film, including the plot. When a movie references popular internet memes/comments on a series, I immediately lose the ability to suspend my disbelief. Chewie getting a medal, the comment on the Holdo Maneuver, Luke catching the lightsaber….. it was no secret that ROS was a movie made to please angry Star Wars fans who commented on the internet. I think that’s the worst part of ROS. “Hey, you guys didn’t like a different story direction, so let’s “fix” the last movie.” Say what you will about George Lucas but the man told the prequel story he wanted, the fans be damned, and now many folks have come around to it. Honestly, the angriest of Star Wars fans are responsible how the sequels went. They caused George to sell SW and Disney played it too safe with FA. Many said FA was just ANH (which I agree with.) TLJ tried to tell a new story and gave us supreme leader Kylo ren. Too many people whined and tied Disney’s hands, so they just puked out a fan service low quality ROTJ. Great job “fans” 👏 I say this as someone who grew up watching SW on VHS before the special editions, they really should have stuck with the direction laid out in TLJ and told the loud internet reactionaries to pound sand (pun intended.)

  • I love how well the line about how in the Star Wars universe you're practically invincible if you're angry enough holds up considering the events of Obi-Wan Kenobi

  • I refuse to believe after all of the complaining, rants, and all the things in this movie that make no sense and how you said it ruined the trilogy you gave this movie an average score.

    • honestly I can see it - aside from the blue color grading on the entire movie it's evident that literally everyone involved with this movie's creation was giving their all and doing their best *except* for the writers who did not fucking care at all. I say 4/10, very shallow/hollow movie but at least the actors tried

  • I genuinely think your changes would've absolutely made this movie into a cinematic masterpiece, man

  • When the world needed him most… he posted a review

    • Did he? All I’m hearing in this is zero substance stretched to an hour to mine the algorithm. I hate how garbage like hurries concise, real reviews.

    • @AetheticMuffin Possibly an E;R reference?

    • He somehow returned

    • @Chris Yasko lol that’s the dude from the “holy fuck go outside meme”

    • One of my favorite content creators, agree with everything you put out there, even if some of it is a little “out there”

  • I feel like the Knights of Ren should have been way more important in The Last Jedi, it would have made it way more interesting if Kylo corrupted them

  • This trilogy honestly felt like they were doing their absolute hardest to ensure that the audience would feel absolutely nothing for any character or event that transpired. They just consistently again and again made poor decision after poor decision that it honestly borderlines on downright improbable that they could come up tails so much.

  • I feel like a lot of people discount their own movie ideas because "they aren't professional writers", but seeing what passes for professional writers nowadays should really fill you with confidence.

  • That hour flew by. Incredibly entertaining and your idea for an ending is leaps and bounds better than what we got.

  • My hot take is that "Somehow, Palpatine returned" isn't a bad line in a vacuum. It's funny that Poe doesn't know why Palpatine is alive and he doesn't care. The problem is that THE MOVIE also doesn't know why Palpatine is alive, so it makes the line seem like a cop-out in context.

    • Ill do you one better. Idk why tf he calls him palpatine and not the emperor? Was his name just common knowledge?

    • @StopTFG Thats literally the plot of the classic game... umm this time we'll use Bionic Commando

    • In future that will be the biggest meme about the Star Wars sequal triology.😂 Imagine having the right to write story for something as big as Star Wars franchise and you write there to one of main charchters say somehow Palpatine has returned, that does not make sence to movie as big as that have as line even.

    • A good writer doesn't leave vacuums in an already mature story line. Disney just has autistic and dyslectic writers. The Cosmonaut was right, Palpatine should have never been brought back as the main baddy.

  • The last part was so perfect that I got goosebumps listening to you about Ben and the rise of skywalker scene. If it was the only change in the movie, then it would have saved it from being a disaster.

  • I remember watching this movie and liking it at first because I was watching it with my brain turned off, but my opinion immediately flipped when Kylo Ren died. Rey should have stayed dead and he should have had to live with the consequences of his actions. I thought about how much better it would have been if it was him that did what Rey did at the end, and to finally see him acknowledge he's a Skywalker. I felt like I was cheated out of a good movie.

  • I think the redemption was fine but I agree they should have had Rey die and Kylo would have to atone for his sins. only she would have known he redeemed himself so he would be hunted for the rest of his life, so he would have to rebuild the jedi order without anybody finding out (possibly changing his name) just like Rey he would have to become a nobody also the way they treated Finn also pisses me off. Honestly if they do another trilogy I hope they bring Ben back. was stupid to kill him off like that or in general. now the Skywalker name is completely gone

    • @Derek Ford A star wars movies without any Skywalkers left? Yeah that would be a disaster for the box office

  • I want to see your end to this trilogy with that Kylo arc so bad now, with him and Rey almost as a Killmonger/T'Challa thing, where they're fighting, but that other pov is there. And Kylo realizing the cost and ending on tatooine would have been so much more satisfying then Rey being a "Skywalker." The kiss stays though, it just gotta lol

  • You missed one of the biggest problems right at the beginning. The opening crawl says that Palpatine broadcast a message to the universe saying that he’s back and he’s more awesome than ever. But then the entire opening sequence is Poe and Finn (and Klaud) are racing to deliver a spy report… that Palpatine came back. The entire opening is made completely pointless from the opening crawl.

    • not to mention that the message was broadcast only in Fortnite and nowhere else lol

    • Even funnier when you consider that the dead already spoke in Star Wars, since there have been force ghosts since the originals AND when you remember that Palpatine spoke… in a live Fornnite event… 🤦🏻‍♂️

    • This was brought to JJs attention while they were making the movie and he yelled, “Quiet! I’m counting my money.”

    • Poe and Finn wouldn't have had to race so hard for it if they just played Fortnite.

  • 48:15 Okay... you probably have a point, but you should probably take into account that this is the same franchise where Darth Vader saves his son at the very last moment by throwing the man he served for 20+ years down a reactor shaft, and there's NO way you could argue that Kylo Ren was worse than Darth Vader.

  • This is your best video. The jokes and edits are spot on. Also just great ideas too. Well done!

  • I have an unfinished re-write of TLJ so I love how you included your own ideas as to how this trilogy could have been more satisfying and successful. We all wanted it to be better but at least we can all celebrate in those unfulfilled wants and desires for this franchise.

  • Loved this review. Thanks for helping me pinpoint my disappointments with this movie and the cause of my sudden Star Wars apathy.

  • A personal gripe I have with this movie is that the planets are so generic. You have yet another sand planet, another jungle planet, and the most boring «bad guy» planet that is desert again but with thunder this time. The original script had the Resistance take back Coruscant from the First Order. That would have tied the whole saga together, got those cheers in the theaters and make the final duel so much cooler. Rey vs Kylo in a wrecked Jedi Council chamber while Finn leads an army of ex-troopers in the streets is the best thing we'll never get.

    • While Canto Bight may have been a pointless subplot, it was at least a really cool idea for a location. Jakku being a ship graveyard also gave it a distinctly different identity from Tatooine, despite being a desert. Ach-To was also different from any planet we'd seen in live action star wars before. On the other hand, I couldn't even tell you the names of a single planet in the Rise of Skywalker, that's how forgettable they were.

    • @Max Welton536,329 Last Jedi had beautiful visuals, that is true. Ach-To was relatively boring to me, but Crait bleeding was beautiful. Although all the plot stuff surrounding it was too dumb to appreciate the cinematography.

    • @Gus Bock That's Hosnian Prime but the two look very similar

    • wasn’t coruscant destroyed during the force awakens or am i tripping

  • Man I gotta say, I love this video, and if I turn off all but two brain cells, I love episode nine. If I use anymore cells, it's painful to watch because it spits in the face of EVERYTHING star wars up until this point. I've had to watch this video in segments cos not only do I get mad about the movie crashing horribly, and than Disney pussying out of making more movies when ALL they had to do was PLAN the trilogy, that is the ONE thing that they needed to do. That is absolutely all they needed, just PLAN THREE movies, and that is IT. But no, I have to watch this in segments because Cosmonaut's rewrite is SO MUCH BETTER than the actual movie, that I have to stop because it makes me so angry that one guy could make a better movie/trilogy than a MULTIMILLION dollar project

  • In the last Jedi I’m pretty sure that Luke says that after he tried to kill Ben/Kylo he woke up with the training grounds burning. Then he says that Ben left with a handful of his other students. I always thought the Knight’s of Ren were just those students Ben ran away with. But if that were the case then why don’t they use lightsabers or the force or anything Jedi related. They just leave out all the details about Kylo Ren’s backstory.

  • Love the changes you made. I want to see that trilogy. 5/10 is still too high. This movie is worse than Morbius, if only because it ruins so many other movies

    • Morbius is one of the movies of all time. Of course TROS would be worse

  • I wholeheartedly agree with almost everything you say in this video except for the stuff about how Kylo Ren shouldn’t be redeemed because he is too evil. Darth Vader slaughtered innocent children but was still able to be redeemed. Although Kylo’s redemption still was extremely lazily written. Besides that great video.

  • A 5/10 still seems outrageously high for me, but I appreciate the detailed analysis. Your rewrites were all excellent

    • TFA is a 7/10 imo, because 7 to me means solid but still needs some improvements, which is what describes TFA imo. The Last Jedi is a 6/10, the cinematography was great and the green, secluded island Luke was on was visually amazing, but Luke was grumpy and even kind of evil, they officially ruined Finn’s character, Rose was not an interesting character, and Rey is just a bad character in all of them. At least Kylo was still cool. Rise of Skywalker is a 2/10 imo

    • @Jason Porter 100% agree on this. Force Awakens, as safe as it was, brought an enjoyable experience. TLJ, although flawed, brought interesting ideas and conflicts, being subversive and enjoyable. Rise of Skywalker just undoes everything the previous two movies had while being so detestable.

    • God heals depression, anxiety, suicidal thoughts, EVERYTHING, God literally heals my physical pain when I ask Him! Trust in God to heal ALL! He is your creator! Lean not on man, you'll never be healed. Know that there is power in the name Jesus Christ! His name casts out demons and heals! People are bothered by his name, for the world hates the truth and wants to continue living sinfully!!!

    • Hey! Did you know God is three in one!? The Father, The Son, and The Holy Spirit! Bless him! Jesus died for our sins, rose from the dead, and gives salvation to everyone who believes in him and follows his commandants! Have a blessed day, everyone!!! ❤

    • I though the writing and plot was bad, but it’s still a high budget Star Wars movie. I stilled enjoyed it. Lightsaber go brr. Spaceships. Space.

  • Nearly three years later and we're still learning new lore about the Knights of Ren. First ghosts, and now ghouls in Star Wars. This proves they have the deepest writing of the sequel trilogy.

  • man doesnt matter if hux is some sort of good guy spy or something because he is still part of the people who literally destroyed multiple planets filled with billions of people, no amount of "Oh but he's a spy all along" is not gonna change that

  • Imagine if Kylo Ren buried Anakin's lightsaber on Naboo that would have made me cry.

  • A couple points: 1) I came out of the theatre saying the exact same thing about the ending, your thoughts on Kylo living and being the one to continue the Jedi legacy and finding a way to forgive himself is what I was thinking too. 2) I think even worse than “somehow, Palpatine returned” was Palpatine’s “I’m ALL the Sith” with Rey’s retort “and I’m all the Jedi”, and all of a sudden we were in a Dragon Ball Z episode.

  • Marcus, you’re totally missing a key aspect of how terrible Palpatine’s return was. Not only was it never hinted at or established during any of the movies or even any tv show/comic/canonical piece of media, he was revealed during a fucking Fortnite event. Truly tragic, RIP Star Wars

    • @GoblinHands Except that Rian threw no sand in his eyes. He frequently visited the set while TFA was filming, kept in contact with JJ to keep up with any plot changes, and sought JJ’s opinion on the TLJ script. JJ approved it, even calling it amazing.

    • @Thomas Toscano Abrams actually approved the script for TLJ, since Rian had the courtesy to keep track of what happened during TFA’s production and asked JJ for input. It was that important for him to create a sequel that followed what TFA set up. But neither Trevorrow nor JJ could be bothered to return the favor. JJ also didn’t have a plan for the ST since he had no intention of returning after TFA. And when he changed his mind, it wasn’t to follow up on what he and Rian set up. Consider that he retconned parts of his own movie along with TLJ and ignored what he established as Leia’s most important goal. Don’t blame Rian for JJ being an unprofessional hack and for Iger kowtowing to TFM.

    • @Ronaldo Mendoza I'd say the same but you'd be amazed at the amount of Disneydrones there are. The amount of people who just watch something because its popular is unbelievable.

    • People forget about this too much.

    • @Maxim Sallet at least they didn't literally release it on April first

  • this video was so satisfying after recently re-watching the trilogy, the characters deserved so much better

  • He spent roughly the same amount of time summarizing the first 30 minutes as it took the first 30 minutes in the movie to happen. Thats just impressive

  • My favorite part of the whole movie is when luke Skywalker shows to help rey and says "its Skywalking time"

  • They actually hinted at Finn being force sensitive in The Force Awakens, and completely dropped it. Then they went back to hinting at it in The Rise of Skywalker. Finn had so much potential as a character and they completely ruined him.

  • I haven't watched the sequel movies because I've been advised by my friends not to, and judging by what I've seen so far they did me a favor. Right off the bat; RISE of Skywalker? After 6 fucking movies of the Skywalker family legacy space opera THIS is their "rise"? As if the Skywalkers weren't legendary in every medium they appear in. Don't even get me started on Rey. Knowing she is a Palpatine makes me disgusted with her. I don't care if she is the most noble and kind hearted soul in the galaxy, after what the Palpatine's did to the Skywalker's SHE HAS NO RIGHT even thinking of associating herself with them. "Honoring the name" my ass. If you want to honor the Skywalkers stay as far away from their family legacy as possible. That's disgusting. Kylo Ren wanting to finish what his grandfather started while completely ignoring he died trying to undo it. Did he miss that part of history or did he simply choose to ignore it and only remembered what fit his agenda? And where is Anakin's force ghost in all of this? Wouldn't the man himself show up to straighten his ass out? Luke seeing the good in a mass murdering dictator who's knee deep into dark side bussiness and has proved time and time again to be ruthless, but losing all hope in a young man who's flirting with the dark side and decides the only option would be to dispose of him??? WTF is happening

  • When The last jedi came out I was mad that Rian Johnson came in and said "Well what If we do this instead" and changed it, over time I came to accept it. Then JJ came back and said " WELL WHAT IF WE DO THIS INSTEAD" and got me pissed even more. Say whatever you want about the prequels but at least George Lucas got to finish the vision he had. 3 movies a complete trilogy for himself giving great ideas and lore for what he started. Here we just get blue balled over ideas that we will never see finished. The trilogy was a essentially 2 directors having a dick measuring contest and everybody goes home blue balled and pissed.

  • 23:00 when the Knights of Ren were introduced, I thought they'd go full anime. Something like Ninja Scroll. And the starting adventure on yet another friggin desert planet actually felt just like that. We finally get to see our main heroes interact with each other, and it was a great 30 or so minutes. Until it turned out that the movie would go into a totally different direction and everything went to absolute shit.

  • Just watched this film for the first time today and one of the funniest and most jarring things in the film for me was that woman who went from wanting to murder Poe to loving him and giving him her only ticket away from the planet in like 5 minutes LMAO

  • I absolutely love the idea of Rey dying and Kylo having to atone. That's such a cool ending rather than just the typical villain being redeemed by saving the hero. I like a lot of ideas in TROS but I agree that they weren't executed very well - this could've made it so much better

    • I'm still hoping we can somehow (lmao) get Ben back. Maybe Rey actually falls to the dark side and the force bring Ben back because of that. Idk. Just something so we can get him back!

    • @Alexander Forbes I think there was a video I watched that talked about that, forgot the name though

    • Agreed, I'm tired of the trope of the villain having to die to make up for their sins. I'd rather see them live and have to stand by their decision to betray their previous world view.

    • It would have subverted expectations in the best way possible, since it's the complete inverse of Anakin's arc. Kylo would be the one who falls to the dark side, yet has to live with that guilt and spend their life atoning, rather than perfect Rey just going off into the sunset as a skywalker.

  • bro ive gotten a lot of these videos in my recommendations, and almost all of them did their own re write which were ALL BETTER than the actual movie, that really says something about how bad the producers fucked up

  • Your rewrites are almost like a therapeutic liquid that I can use to wash this empty, dusty, grand-finale-shaped container that this movie tossed over its shoulder as it was walking out. For the longest time I saw this video pop up in my feed and always avoided it, because I would read the thumbnail and go, "yeah, we know why it sucks" and move on. (But I think I was really just avoiding my anger towards this film lol) And boy am I glad I finally decided to check this out because my god man you have articulated every emotion I felt about this movie with such accurate and hilarious cutaway reactions. Not only is your editing so on-point and funny, but the way you use it to illustrate your feelings about this is so well done, and very relatable for me. I personally really like Force Awakens and Last Jedi, both have their flaws of course, however, Force Awakens was like a reintroduction to the Star Wars world for newer generations, reminding us what we love about Star Wars. Then, I felt Last Jedi took what we love and brought it to a newer place, a little bit of a darker place, but it felt organic and I kinda love how Ryan Johnson was basically saying, "No more Snoke, cut him in half, No more Palpatine-copy, No more Death Stars, this is making way for NEWER stories within this world." But Rise of Skywalker seems to be too afraid to make people think too hard, so it takes all of that interesting story-telling back to a very regressive, non-evolutionary state, with the most cliche writing I've ever seen in my life. This movie left a horribly bitter taste of betrayal and corporate ignorance in my mouth, but I'm so thankful your words were able to wash it away for a while. This is a great video man, well done.

  • something I want to say about the fight between Rey and kyloren is that several times their lightsabers go straight through each other and near the beginning of the fight a lightsaber goes right through Rey's leg.

  • I remember me and my friends go saw this movie when it came out, when we thought Chewbacca got killed one of my friends were tearing up. But 2 minutes after he came back she got super pissed and regretted crying lol

  • Finn fighting Captain Phasma as his finale fight would've been amazing 🥺 Idk if he played the FMA: Brotherhood final OP at the beginning on purpose to imply this, but imagine if it was like the FMAB finale, where everyone has a GOOD final fight simultaneously. It would require a veeeerrrrry good editor to make it flow properly, but IMAGINE: Rey vs. Kylo Ren Finn vs. Captain Phasma Poe vs. An established First Order pilot, maybe? (I kind of like the thousand ship battle at the end, although I agree it's not earned in the actual film. Anyway, I just want Poe to be in that with a specific First Order foil)

  • I actually really, really liked the Last Jedi. When I first watched the Force Awakens, I was very intruiged, but was put off by the JJ specialty "mystery box" ideas. I felt like the Last Jedi really improved the story by taking away the obvious Star Wars tropes, especially that Rey did not come from force sensitive parents. I loved that she was a nobody. It felt like the whole Star Wars universe opens up to so many more posibilities. I also loved the premature killing of Snoke, because it felt like it revealed the true villain of the story, Kylo Ren. I felt like you expected Kylo to turn good, and that was a great turn in the story for me, the fact that Ben Solo couldn't be saved, and that he was too far gone. Some things in the movie did not make sense, and I didn't like all of it, but overall I liked the direction of the main story. The Rise of Skywalker, however, ruined all of the good things from the movie. I've never seen a movie so insistent on ruining the last movie in the series as much as RoS. The most immature, cowardly movie I've ever seen. Oh, the internet didn't like Rose? TAKE HER OUT. The internet didn't like Rey not being force nobility? SHES A PALPATINE. The internet didn't like Kylo being bad? MAKE HIM GOOD. The internet didn't like the main villain dying early? BRING BACK PALPATINE. China doesn't like homsexual characters, and Disney feels like it has to cater to their governments wants even though the original Star Wars didn't come out in China so they have no sense of nostalgia for Star Wars, and so the new movies consistently bomb because they don't see them through the rose-tinted glasses we do and just as the shitty actions movies they've now become? MAKE ANY GAY STUFF EASY TO TAKE OUT OF THE MOVIE SO THE CHINESE GOVERNMENT WILL LIKE IT. Like c'mon, seriously? I get some people don't like the Last Jedi, but I think everyone can agree that Rise of Skywalker would have been better if they had stuck to the beats of the Last Jedi, and not try to redo everything.

    • As much as I didn't like TLJ, I have to agree with you. Despite my disagreements with some vital aspects of TLJ, I would've preferred to see a somewhat coherent continuation instead of a clusterf*** damage control of a movie this turns out to be.

    • @Lord Grim i agree with what you said at the end, that the trilogy had no purpose and that is was just two directors changing each others plans. I don't agree that killing snoke was a bad decision because he was the main villain. He was killed in order to step aside for the real villain of the trilogy, Kylo Ren. I also don't agree that Rey being a good force user is bad, because so was Luke in the original Star Wars with almost no training. All in all, people can have two differing opinions, what I think is important is that the trilogy had no planing originally, which opened it up to interpretations from whichever director made the next movie, which obviously did not work.

    • No, you can’t stick to what the LJ did because most of the plot point were ENDED. Killin off smoke made no sense because he’s suppose to be the big boss. A boss that Kylo was clearly under. Kylo killing him off in such a bs way destroy him even being considered anything to begin with. Having Finn and Poe not do hack shit doesn’t help the movie. Nor does having Rey become practically the stronger user in literally a week just cause. I’m not even going to talk about Luke and what was made of him. Regardless TLJ literally destroys what was set up before it (hence Rian himself saying he wanted to make a movie that was decisive to begin with) that ended of so many plot point that there’s no where else to go. The entire trilogy had no purpose or plan. Just 2 directors changing what the other set up. It was screwed the second the first movie came out